What made you become a pet eater? Well, there are these two [crazy] people named Carol and Yan. I want to be just like them, so I had to start eating pets . And now, I'm in love with eating pets. I remember when I was 5 I ate a pet bird, but didn't like it, so I didn't eat any more. But then I knew I had to if I wanted to be Carol and Yan.
What was the first pet that you ate? What was it like and how did it taste?
A bird, as stated above. It tasted awful. Like all the books in the world were burned and their ashes were served as food. But maybe that was because I was only 5 at the time and didn't remove the feathers.
Do you own a pet?
Just the ones in my stomach.
When you capture them, do you treat them nicely at first and gain their trust (while plumping them up) or do you just stick them in a cage and throw scraps of food at them?
I think it is necessary to treat them nicely. I mean, they will soon be gone, so they deserve some respect. Plus, I've found that if they are happier, they taste better.
Do you use protective equipment when handling these vicious yet tasty creatures?
Never! No pet is stronger than I. Muahaha.
What do you feed your 'pets' to keep them nice and plump and juicy?
The limbs of certain people in my school who I don't like. It's an easy way to eliminate them but not have to have to dig a grave. Digging a grave can be tiring.
Do you like to suck their blood out first?
No. I like to save the blood so that I can use it to paint my nails. It's a wonderful color.
Do you skin them?
Of course. We can't waste any part of the animal. Gotta get rid of the evidence.
Do you like to keep the pelts to make a rug or fur coat?Fur coat? Psh. Try "whole fur outfit." Where else would I get my clothes?
How do you like your pets? Broiled, grilled, or fried? What's your preferred method of cooking them?
I like to simply fry them, then blend them up so I can put them on a cake like they're frosting. Mmm.
What do you do with the bones? Do you feed them to the dog to 'fatten' him up?
I make them into bookshelves. I'm running out of bookshelves though, so I'll have to eat some more pets for the bones.
Do you have a breeding pet?
I did, but then I couldn't resist eating her. She just looked so tasty, with all those puppies in her.
Do you eat alley cats as well?
No. I can never get them clean enough. So now I send them off to find me other pets to eat. And then to reward them, I give them Carol's books to eat.
Do you prefer grandma cats or alley cats? Which ones are easier to cook?Grandma cats FOR SURE. They cook more quickly and aren't as dirty as alley cats.
Do you like horses? If so, what's your favorite breed? How long does one horse feed you?
I've never eaten a horse. Are they any good?
What's an animal that you'd like to try one day?
Hmm....well, I guess a horse so that I could properly answer the previous question. A human sounds pretty good too.
Khy is giving away a copy of Golden Girls by Micol Ostow OR (winner's choice) The One by Ed Dector. This giveaway if for US and Canada residents only! Sorry!
All you need to do is answer the following question: Do you prefer grandma cats or alley cats?
The winning entry will need to have creativity, execution, and by far the most important, humor. Meaning this is NOT a random giveaway. There is no limit to how much you can write or how little you need to write.
For a second chance to win, head on over to Carol's blog where you will receive a second question to answer. Please leave the answer to her question on HER blog. Only one winner will be chosen from the combined entries (meaning we will pick one winner from all the entries from both mine and her blog).
All entries (for all the giveaways) must be received, via commented or emailed, by 25th of April. Winners will be announced at the same time later that week.
om nom nom.
ReplyDeleteGrandma cats because you know they would always being well taken care of! So their flesh would be yummier because I'm sure the Grandmas would feed them profusely and well groomed! Alley cats? I will likely die from something they picked up! Not good for the system!
ReplyDeleteI like both!! However, if I had to choose between an alley cat or Grandmas cat, I would have to choose the alley cat. Yes, I know that he might have a disease, but I just can't bear to think about the look on Grandma's face when she went into the basement to feed Muffins and found a pile of bones and a bunch of cat hair! It would be dreadful. Plus, I like to live on the wild side, so an alley cat suits me well!
ReplyDeletecountrystars95@yahoo.com
Alley cats because I like to play with my food before I dine. Grandma cats are so chubby! They can hardly run anywhere and that doesn't make for a very good chase. Alley cats, on the other hand, have the ability to evade me by jumping over fences and such.
ReplyDeletepepsivanilla14(at)hotmail(dot)com
Yuck, Grandma cats are gross! They're always cranky, and like Khy said, they taste better if they're happy. Which makes Grandma cats taste DISGUSTING!
ReplyDeleteAlley cats though, you can just take them to the vet, get them all healed up and everything. Then they're happy because you got them all healthy, which makes them all the more delicIous. YUM!
michelle.kuool(at)yahoo(dot)com
Definitely Alley Cats, all that attitude gives them a special flavor!
ReplyDeleteNeither. Tame cats are so... bland. I like wild cats. Lynx, panthers, bobats, cougars, that kinda thing. Not lions or tigers, they're too rare and you can get a major find if you're caught with them. No, a cougar is my favourite. Sure, they're a bit harder to catch, but it's good exercise!
ReplyDeleteGrandma cats, they are always well taken care of and spoiled that gives them that special flavor.. Alley cats are to unpredictable and they have like dieseases which if you eat makes you crazy. Grandma cats are so polite and properly groomed and never smell which makes them taste really good.
ReplyDeleteMegan
bookworm8675309@yahoo.com
Alley cats: They are dirty and are hard to wash so definitley not them!
ReplyDeleteGrandma Cats: I have a theory that cats taste better as they age (Like wine) so i try and save the cats until they are at least 13.
-Senfaye :P
annieluvsmuffin@Gmail.com
Alley cats - they're tough and stringy, so you can floss with them afterwards!
ReplyDeleteAlley cats. They're spicy. And oh-so-bad. Rawr.
ReplyDeleteGrandma cats, alley cats - I like either as long as they come in the form of kittens! Mmmm, nothing like baby animals - cute, cuddly, and DELICIOUS! :}
ReplyDeleteHowever, I have to tread with care when it comes to cats. I have to make sure to skin them thoroughly (wearing a face mask and super-tough gloves) since I am allergic to cat hair. The insides though! Mmmm, I guess I would have to say grandma kittens have a softer belly that just melts in your mouth like M&Ms! Alley kittens are just a little too scrawny and tough.
I'm going with Grandma Cats because you don't have to deal with the festering wounds and lice of Alley Cats. Instead, you get an animal with loads of fat already on its bones to baste in. Typing this is making me drool already.
ReplyDeleteIf you're really lucky, you'll find a grandma who's also into gardening. Think of all those nice herbs and spices just waiting for little kitty to be put in the oven!
Grandma cats? That's just plain cruel! And they taste awful! But alley cats... they have that exotic flavor. Especially alley kittens, who surely must be evil, vile creatures. Why else would they be so cute? It's better to eat them before they eat us!
ReplyDeleteparadoxrevealed (at) aim (dot) com
Grandma cats of course. That way, if it bites, me I can bite it back. And it would turn me into a grandma, and I can become an old lady teaching middle school students and tell them that I eat cat food, and do my business in the litter box. Oh, and that I can blab on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about my grandma cat.
ReplyDeleteGrandma cats...because you know they pretend to watch Golden Girls but really they're listening to Snoop Dogg through their hearing aids and getting some California Love :D
ReplyDelete